February 2019 Reflections

I sit down to write this on the last quarter moon before some big energy in March. I’ve already been feeling it! The full moon in Virgo was a huge flush to my system. I am basking in the rewards the moon brought out of me but I am also feeling raw, exposed, and vulnerable – and all the anxiety that comes with that.

As my new, thicker skin grows I am reflecting on the themes that arose over this moon cycle.

I felt the residual eclipse energy over the first quarter. The moon was out in the early evening and I could see the waxing crescent illuminated but I could also see a black silhouette of the moon’s full potential. It was a ghostly and magical highlight and I felt it reflected in me.

Over the first half of the cycle I started another yoga challenge and adopted the mantra “power thru”. On the new moon I found the energy to meditate and create a spray to help connect to my inner power reserves.

If you are interested in that spell, I wrote about it more in depth here.

The second week of the moon cycle was also my first week of unemployment. I quit my job of a year and a half to give myself the month of March to collect myself and move across the country. All of this was totally nuts and my body and spirit felt the need to purge.

I ended up getting very sick for my first week off. Luckily I had great people looking out for me and I was able to be productive. Marie Kondo has blown up this month and I took some of that energy to clean out not just my apartment, but all my hard drives. The digital clean out took no physical energy but really drained me emotionally. I kept reminding myself through my illness that the universe was telling me something and I needed to focus on my physical body right now.

By the time the full moon rolled around, I was feeling healthier. I shifted focus to my spiritual and emotional being. My heart felt like it needed a little boost. On the last night of the full moon I did a simple self-love spell by carving a Sigil into a red candle. I surrounded it with stones and herbs that I felt would help my heart open but remain protected. I burned and meditated with the candle for three days. I truly think this candle gave me the push I needed.

If you are interested in my inspo for sigil work, here is a link to the Traveling Witch – she gives a great breakdown.

Over those three days I focused on communicating so many things that have held me back for a long time. The digital clean out brought up a lot of memories from college – most amazing, but some were traumatic. Reminiscing and talking things through with the perspective of time lead to productive conversations with people I really love (and who really love me).

A reoccurring theme of advocating for oneself came up over the following week. I felt drawn to work with my throat chakra and speak my mind. The results were palpable. I was able to get the help I needed in trying moments (my car was broken into holllerrrrrrrr).

I accepted that I need people. This is something I have struggled with for a long time. Most of my circle is pretty introverted. No shade, it’s just that my closest friends need recharging and processing time behind closed doors. I am the opposite. When faced with hard feelings I want to work them out with people. For the longest time I felt like something was wrong with me because no one else close to me was like this. I pushed myself into corners and isolated myself from people as a way of “training” myself to get things done on my own. I did learn a lot through those periods of self-reliance but in the background I still felt unsatisfied and alone (as a depressed person I am hyper sensitive to feelings of loneliness).

On this moon cycle I was able to verbalize this to my partners and my friends. I was able to ask for what I needed, while giving them the distance to work out what they needed to, in the way they needed to do it. I feel all our connections deepening.

Basically life is good (hard, but good) and communication is key.

I have also been using the moon to do actionable “small magic” things  – like accomplishing my move out goals. My roommates met up to discuss move out on the full moon. I went for night walks to get my body moving and bask in the moonlight. I cleaned! I am making space in my life to accomplish more and to get more joy. You don’t have to be doing spells every day to connect with the magic around you.

For the last quarter I was feeling a little depleted from my recent emotional labor (fruitful but exhausting). I did a small ritual tarot reading focusing on the connection of mind, body, and spirit. My hope was to give myself something to meditate on as I transition into the energy of March.

Here is a link for more info on that ritual.

Funnily enough, around the full moon I was really drawn to the idea of how my mind, body, and spirit link together in my practice. I was percolating on it but something told me to hold off. March is a number 3 month and the number 3 resonated with the connection of mind, body, and spirit. Intuition works out miraculously sometimes. I am definitely going to try and harness some of this number three energy in my spells for the month of March.

I have been dreading and revving up for this month for a while. I’ve known for a while that it was going to be a huge end to a chapter no matter how it manifested. Now I am seeing how this will play out.

I have to sell all my furniture, pack up my car and move. I also have to manage my relationships and let all the people I am leaving know how much I love them. On top of that I am still going to night classes and I’m trying to develop other creative projects to take home with me. So yeah, it’s going to be a big month and that’s not even considering that Mercury is retrograde for pretty much all of it.

But everything I have read says that there will be lots of creative energy and we can harness that to work through hard feelings that come up. It’s also Pisces season and my birth month so I super identify with the “go with the flow” mentality of my fish sisters. Releasing to the flow of the universe is going to serve me well over the coming weeks. I recognize that I am capable and I put in the work so things will work out the way they need to.

I am excited to plan my March goals. In many ways I was super successful in accomplishing what I set out to do in February (with the exception of my goal to stop hitting snooze in the morning – that will definitely carry over into future months). March will be no exception. I’m excited to “power thru” and share what I learn.

Much love –Riss